Yeah sic

I haven't been blogging ... Yeah so... Went to Art Downtown tonite n bought this cat ring from Heartside Gallery (where homeless people n others can come create n sell their art).

Good Deeds

Saw Tyler Perry's movie Good Deeds. I recommend it. At the end my neighbor Mary said something to me, because I was a bit like the struggling single mother in the film, and I just wept... Because I had a flashback to when I was homeless and spent a winter sleeping in my car. I wish someone like the man in the movie would come rescue me, but alas it's a fairy tale- another Cinderella story-I enjoyed the dream though.

Fiesty

Frustrated with how people behave and their disregard n disrespect for others. Sometimes all I can do is look at the moon n allow myself to feel small.

How do they do it?

I look at street artists work...such as this Flickr photostream of French artist Christian Guémy aka C215 ....

...and I'm blown away by the amount of work they've been able to create in their life time and the amount of traveling they've done to make a presence with their art around the world.  It makes me feel so small, weak, and useless.  It makes me upset that I've been plagued by so many health problems for the majority of my life, and how that takes a toll on my financial stability--how I have to work harder than most to make less to get by.  Maybe I should be upset that I'm not a man?  Because a healthy man can travel the globe and get by without certain accommodations that I wouldn't be able to.  Today, I feel like shit.  Headache and then some.  I napped and I feel nauseous.  My insides are burning.  My mind wants to do so much, my body doesn't always cooperate.  $ is not there and bankruptcy is likely around the corner.  I wish I could lead a life of creativity.  I wish I could live a life of love.  I wish I could make an impact.  I wish I didn't have health problems.  But here I am in my pajamas feeling like shit.  Feeling small.  Feeling powerless.

boo hoo

We all have our days, so I'm not going to apologize for my whining.  I will say...I am not jealous (maybe envious) of C215, in fact I admire him and the many others who do what he does.  I'm grateful for the Internet and photography, so that I can be the arm chair traveler.  But shit damn...I've lived through so much and I just feel like I need to do something HUGE!

those puppy dog eyes

I cut a boy's hair yesterday--the son of my sweet mailman.  When I opened the door and saw the boy and we looked each other in the eyes, I nearly fell backwards (or forward to pick him up and hug him).  He looked exactly like my ex-husband's son.  He looked exactly as my ex-husband looked as a boy.  His eyes are exactly like my ex-husband's and his son.  Surreal.  It was a joy to have him here, but what am I supposed to do with this surreal experience?  What is the universe trying to share with me?

Skull tattoo

I want a tattoo to represent my poetry group the Almost Dead Poets Society
I drew the one in the first image for my Hung Out to Dry show.  The second image is like a woodcut (but softer material) I did some printmaking with.  I kinda dig the one eye look, but then part of me just wants to go with the 1st one that came out of me.  What do you think?

Fashionista

Posted some newbies to my asos marketplace collection

this one sold to my lovely model Kristen--after all, she rocks it so well!

They call me Moonshine...

maybe it's cuz I dig standing under the moonlight and takin pix of the glowing orb that so entices me...or maybe it's because I just got back from the atmosphere with drops of Jupiter in my hair.

crescent moon, Venus top, Jupiter below

the line thru the moon is a tree branch in the foreground, and the planet is Venus

Have you noticed the 2 stars hanging out together in the sky this beautiful month of March?  They are the planets Venus (the biggest, brightest of them) and Jupiter (hanging out below Venus).
I felt compelled to go out there to shoot them tonight.  Jupiter seems to have fallen south since I just saw him earlier this evening.  He almost slipped behind some building away from my view, but I captured the more demure planet of the two before he moved further along.

Skype

Who Skypes?  What's ur take on this video chat program?  It's integrated with Facebook, though I never got to see my friend the first time I tried it yesterday.  I had to just look at my ugly mug up there!  So, I just made faces to myself, and for her and whoever else was on her end to see.  I think I'm too dorky for this.  Though I think it'd be cool to see people--like my cousins in France--and interact with them with live view, but...well...I'm just too dorky.

Blog Topic request - The Queerness of Forever in Love

Here's another blog topic blast from the past request via myspace:

March 14, 2009

 

 

The Queerness of Forever in Love

Current mood:nostalgic

Ok Shannon, as per your request, I'm finally writing this blog!

What a great, deep topic.  I thought I could easily roll something off my tongue and put it in a blog like an easy, breezy conversation over coffee.  But nope.  I was in AZ, thoroughly enjoying myself, and I believe subconsciously I just didn't wanna go there with my thoughts.  Cuz I knew, if I write about love, I'm gonna write about Chris.  Well, at least when that word "Forever" is part of the subject.

*Damn it...I need to blow my nose...been crying already.  fuck

And, for the record, the time I am now beginning to write this is 1:16 pm.  Chris is my ex-husband.  Over a decade has gone by since I've seen him.  I still remember when he proposed.  It was 1:16 am.  I was drifting off to sleep and he awoke me.  His bright little smile leaning over me.  And he asked me, "Will you marry me?"  My eyes popped opened, I looked at the clock, and said, "It's 1:16 in the morning, do you know what you're saying?"  He smiled that smile that melts me even now just in my thoughts.  He told me that he was out with his friend having coffee, and his friend was rambling about his f'd up relationship with his girlfriend, and it made him realize how lucky he is--we are.  And that we were.  We had some challenges in life, as all couples and people do, but damn, we were a fit.

*Had to grab the Kleenex box, toss the used tissue on the floor,   fuck.  my eyes are gonna be puffy later.

Ok, so do I believe in Forever in Love?  Yes.  But that is a loaded question.  I believe I'm capable of loving until the end of my earthly existence, because here I am still weeping for him.  I have loved before and after him, it's just different.  I don't like to refer to it as love or in love, like some do when they say, "Oh, I love you, but I'm not in love with you", because I've been told that bullshit before.  I love him.  Period.  I believe that in love business is equivalent to infatuation, because I've heard it from people (mostly girls) and I have found it to be more of the selfish type of love, like I gotta have you, I gotta see you, I don't want anyone else to have you, I'm obsessing over you, I got it bad for you.  But that type of love is so fleeting!  Anything that burns that hot so early on, is likely to get snuffed out when the flames reach the sprinkle system on the ceiling of fickle Love.

I have a feeling this might be the "Eccentricity in Love" you're referring to Shannon. You and others, have probably had someone come on real strong and promise the moon.  I hang it in the sky for one person (someone who reminds me of Chris, but could never be him) but I never promise to give the moon to anyone!

The moon.  The earth.  The sky.  The stars.  FOREVER is not ours to give.  No one can really promise that.  I think time reveals.  I take life like this:  We have today.  Let's make the most of it!  If someone is still holding my hand 5, 10, 20 years from now.  Wow.  They must love and respect me.  I just can't digest someone throwing out such eccentric words so prematurely in relationships, by saying things like "I wanna be with you forever."  So, back to this Chris person...I'm not with him.  But I do genuinely love him.  It would be validating to know that he feels the same.  I'm sure he does love me, but I mean to the core like I love him.  He's so lucky to have this kind of love from me, because I'm beginning to think it's rare, and that some are even incapable of offering this kind of love to another (unless it is their child, and that's completely different dynamics).  I believe most people love selfishly.  That's why people destroy property, fight the competition, and even kill, when they feel they have lost their prize.

Nope, not me.  He's with someone else.  I still love him.  I don't hate her.

Humans are animals.  We are not a species that is designed to be monogamous for life.  That's where humans (dare I say male?) creation of religion, and manipulation of doctrines, ideas and minds comes into play.  The topic of religion, the bible, etc. is better left for another blog.  I'm an educated woman, and have become a philosopher after my long, arduous years of living (and near death experiences).  I adore the animals/birds that do mate for life.  It's romantic.  I also understand the animals that live in packs, or solitary.  Sometimes, I wish I was one of those birds with a life-long mate.  Sometimes, I have to put myself in check, acknowledge how grand this life is no matter what path we are designed to take, and make the most of it.  I always repeat to myself and others Everything Happens for a Reason.  Do I believe that?  I'm not certain.  The only thing in life that is certain, is that everything is uncertain.  But I want to believe a reason exists.  I want to believe that my path on this winding road is where I'm supposed to be.  The new people I meet are meant to come into my life (or me into theirs) for a reason.  If one relationship didn't end, then we wouldn't meet the interesting people of our future.  We need to embrace that.  If our path leads us back to someplace familiar, we should embrace that too.

For now, I say to Chris....

I can't promise you forever.  But I can tell you that my love is unwavering.  I've loved others.  I want to love more.  But you are a part of who I've become.  You remind me of what is good inside me.  The love I have for you is a guide, for what I hope to find along my path--someone to love me as completely and unconditionally as I have loved you.  Whether the path leads me to someone new, or back to you, is uncertain.  I'll just keep painting, writing, snapping photos of the wonders of the world, and keep hoping....I am here for a reason.

Blog Topic request: Change

Since my last post was a recent blog topic request, I thought I'd pull a couple I had from when I was on myspace and share them here.  This one is still fitting today, because I was recently talking to a friend about how change can be good.  Just a few short months later I was diagnosed with breast cancer,  I more or less lost my job and the majority of my clientele as a result of this change (I was working in a barbershop), the economy really took a dump (so I couldn't sell if I wanted to), and well...life goes on, and here I sit.  I'm eternally grateful for my life, for the people and animals in it, and I like to believe every happens for a reason...blah blah blah.  I really don't know what the future has in store for me.  I have a thirst for travel and new experiences, but I am content right where I am too.  Ultimately, I think I want someone in my life.  A loving companion.  I think I'd like to be right here with them, and do some traveling.  It's not that I wouldn't consider a move anymore, but I'm like the caged bird that would need to be acclimated to a change in environment now. 

Here it goes from May 29, 2009:

Change

Current mood:contemplative

This subject is on Kristine Young's request...Change

I've pondered how to tackle this subject.  Spare change?  Easy!  I'd drop a couple quarters in the candy machine at the movie theater and get some Runts and Mike & Ikes!  Making other changes?  Not so easy.  Ultimately, however, I still believe change is good.

I have been contemplating a big move for several years now.  With each passing winter day that decision for change becomes more pressing.  I have dreamed of a move to Miami--where it's sunny, the ocean could wash away my worries, the warm weather might mean better physical health and probably be emotionally satisfying too.  I want to be around more single people.  Grand Rapids is a nice place to raise a family, but I am the anamoly of this city--no family, no spouse, no kids.  For most people around here they have extended families, and marry young.  The mindset here is different than I was accustomed to on the east of the state.  Though I've found a niche of diverse people and places to hang out with and at, I still long for something more.  I also want to be someplace that has a larger art scene--both for the exposure of my own artworks, and to enjoy art related activities (visual arts, music, etc.).  Around here, it seems like all people know how to do is drink.  Social and communication skills seem to have been run over.

Recently I visited Scottsdale, AZ.  I would love to move there.  I'm not sure how long I would stay there, but it would be a pleasant change.  The gathering places are very hip & trendy.  There are many galleries.  I would be reasonably close to other artistic hot spots--like San Diego.  I would be either a short drive or direct, cheap flight away from many cities/states that I'd like to visit.  I could cover more turf, more easily than I can from the midwest.  I'd like to see more of Cali/Sante Fe, New Mexico/Colorado/Portland, Oregon/Seattle.  I could do more networking with my art.  I could meet interesting, new people.

This would be a big change.  Change in jobs.  Change in living arrangements.  I would probably have to take a cut on my condo, and go back to renting.  Probably have to have a roommate to start off.  A definite change in climate.  Many people are afraid of change.  And there is something to be said about security and stability.  But me, I know how fragile and short life can be, and I'm afraid to not live it fully and completely.

Have any of you seen Revoluntionary Road?  Wow.  I went to see it alone.  Yep, got my candy, and a frozen coke.  :)  I wanted to see what this married couple who seemed to have achieved the white picket fence American dream were longing for, or what kind of demons they were battling.  I often wonder what it would be like to be like so many of the people I am surrounded by here in married, white, family land.  I have moments where I might feel a tinge of envy, when I am struggling all alone.  But for the most part...I believe I am more ALIVE than most people here.  I guess I just wanna go find some more living creatures.  My take on the movie might be a little different than how others here view it to be.  I saw the couple as two highly passionate people who simply wanted something more out of life than what they had.  As good as what they had might have appeared to others looking in, they were looking outward.  It was an eye opener for me. 

And I think it's okay to want more. 

To want something different. 

To seek Change.

So...what kind of change do you want to make? 
and do you have the guts to do it?

Blog Topic Request: WWAD?

I put the request for blog topic suggestions out there, and here's what I got:

Suggestion:
I would be interested in what your artists friends (or you) think/do/or experiences in dealing with:
Making the wrong choice, even when you know it's wrong...

My response:
That's good...care to elaborate? Concerning relationships? Work? Family ? Or open ended question?

Suggestion elaborated:
 All of the above... I believe the creativity, reckless abandon, and the lack of inhibition that makes artists who they are, spills over into the life choices of the artists. Which is why artists seem to have more "colorful" drama... for a lack of a better description, The" Hank Moody's" of the real world. The trouble, perils, and ultimately greater rewards of pursuing what makes them tick...


So, I'm taking this as What Would Artists Do?  My gosh, this could become huge!  Tons of questions piling in about all kinds of situations asking WWAD?  I could even get bracelets made!  woohoo!

Ok, now seriously....

I think this is a great question, though honestly, I'm not sure I'm the right one to answer it.  But it was directed to me/for my blog, so here it here it go:

I guess stereotypes come about for a reason...if enough of a certain group of people act a certain way, they get stereotyped.  I stereotype cops--unless they prove themselves otherwise--I admit.  Even artists...yes, there are a lot of them who over indulge in drugs and alcohol and wild behavior (or just sit on couches and talk about what they are gonna do, but ultimately never do it).  But me...I'm not an over indulger of these vices, and drama will send me running FAST.

I can't say that I make the wrong choice even when I know it's wrong.  I make mistakes--everyone does--but I'm not reckless.  I think things through--possibly too much.  I'm a thinker.  I'm also a feeler--often too much so for my own good.  I'm an empath--so I've been told, and have to agree.  I am no Hank Moody--though I dig the show Californication that his character is on, because I like to drain my brain of all that thinking sometimes and soak up some brain dead TV.  Personally, there are some other shows that top that one for me though, like My Name is Earl-- it functions much better at giving me laughs, and helping me clear my mind for sleep.  Arrested Development worked for a bit too.  The only thing I have in common with Hank Moody is that there is cool art on the walls in some of the shots, and I think it would be cool if some of my art could hang in one of those episodes.

My troubles and perils have predominantly been related to my near death experiences, countless health challenges, deaths of loved ones (including beloved pets, and the loss of my mother being the greatest loss of all), and the emotional and financial challenges that have been attached to these events.  I don't have a lot of drama with ex's.  I have one person who I loved--still love--whole heartedly and unconditionally.  I feel no animosity toward any ex.  Actually, anyone I have loved romantically I have loved unconditionally.  It just was never the same as it was with this one soulmate.  I easily moved forward after anything ended with anyone else.  I might shed a tear here or there, or feel a little sadness if it ended abruptly or in a not so kind manner, but I don't create or indulge in drama.  And after a few days, wow...it's almost shocking how easily I can shake it off.  But you know...when you've seen as much death as I have, and been so close to death as I have, things just line up under a different perspective than they do for others.

So you see....I have more in common with Vietnam Vets than I do with other artists.

As far as getting at the "greater rewards of pursuing what makes them tick.." This Artist--ArtistCG--me--I--can't really say for sure how I would have ended up if #1 I never had cancer and been through a bone marrow transplant #2 My marriage never ended #3 I never lost my mother or witnessed the other deaths that I have.  Maybe I'd be making a whole lot more money?  Maybe I'd have a 40 hour white collar job?  Maybe I'd have what would appear like the American Dream, but maybe there could be drama behind the scenes?  Maybe.........I wouldn't be the artist that I am.  Hmmm...one never knows.

My advice to the asker or anyone else would be:

• Try to make the right choices that align with your heart so that you have no regrets.  
• If you have a passion--pursue it.  
• If you are extremely stressed at your job, considering quitting it--yes, quitting--and getting another job.  You might have to make sacrifices in other areas, but ultimately you can make it balance.  
• Don't stay with someone if they don't complete you.  
• Don't just screw around if the repercussions from doing so are too troublesome.  

Make choices that you can be comfortable with the results of.
If you try something (or someone) and you went into it thinking it was the right choice, and suddenly it goes wrong.  Don't beat yourself or the other person up.  It was the right choice for the time.  And when you move on, that can be the right choice too.  I try to believe--and it might just be a coping mechanism--that everything happens for reason.  I believe we meet others for a reason--for us to change their lives, them to change ours, or perhaps for a mutual exchange.  And even if a relationship goes sour, at the time if it felt right, so be it....we have helped them move forward with their destiny, and they have done the same for us.

So, you see for me...it isn't crazy creative choices spilling over into my life, it's my life spilling over into my creativity...and I hope I use it wisely...I hope I make positive changes to change the world in a positive manner.  The aforementioned lack of inhibition that makes stereotypical "artists who they are" ...I certainly can't relate to.  I am expressive.  I am painfully intelligent.  Therefore, I have educated opinions that can make some uneasy.  I am open minded.  But I'm much more of a loner than anyone realizes, and at times losing some inhibition might actually be good for me.


WWACGD?

WRITE ON!

that black man o mine

Oh Mickey Lou Peebody how I love thee...let me count the ways....
#1  great spooner!
#2  you bring me balls and mice
#3  you walk on a lease & look cool doing it!
#4  you accept my hundreds of kisses a day to your head and ears
#5  your purrs bring down my blood pressure
#6  you are an excellent model!!!!!!
...and many more of course!

 Today's shot with a macro lens:

Untitled as of yet

a poem by Colette
written the eve of May 16, 2012

I just wish he would talk to me

Guess they got married

Not something I could do

            No

I’d fall apart from the memories

            that would fill the sacred space

Between me              and            you

My black cat knows my soul

            is drifting

And he brings me a ball

            and cries out                        until

I am brought back to my land of today

            Crying

Hoping tomorrow will bring me luck

I’m just doing what I always do...

            entertaining

I’m still the jester

            puttin’ on the smiles for anyone

and everyone

who wants to collect some

    But it’s yours that I miss

and you look into my eyes

            only through a picture

and instantly mine fill with tears

            of the yesterdays I can’t correct

                 of the today that is still missing you

   of the tomorrow where I will be

            smiling            laughing

     but still longing

for the day I can hear your voice

            again

and feel at peace

SKIN DEEP

a poem by Colette

Victorious in battle

            that’s what my name means.

but I keeps it clean

Got on that cancers saddle

            rode it / told it             Get Gone!

Harnessed the ability to not only survive

            but thrive

Got on the list of Deans

            Triple degree education

Living / Dying / Trying            Since I was 17

            and before

it seems

It doesn’t matter if you’re secular

            singular / plural

Christian / Buddhist / Monk / skunk

            Black / White

punk

Muslim / Jewish / blue-ish

We’re All Just Bones

            and in the root of our bone marrow

not alone

We’re all connected.

If I ever need plastic surgery....

...I wanna know who Bernadette Peter's surgeon is!!!!!

I just saw her on Smash, and I was like "Whoa!  She looks hot!  and Natural!"  I had to get on the net and see if I could find any info.  Most seem to speculate that she might have done some minor things, but nothing over-the-top.  Clearly!  Because she looks superb!  And she's 64!  It hurts for me to even state her age, cuz honey she sho don't look it!  And damn...those red curls are to die for!

I would consider surgery for a few things that trouble me, but I'm mostly afraid of coming out looking tooo different--and I don't want that!  I wanna be me...I would just be interested in ridding myself of some of the signs of my troubled past.  So Bernie...if you read this...please contact me and I'll keep it on the D-Low!

The Good Life

Golden Goddess

I am honored to be featured on my friend & writer Claudia Moss's blog A Golden Life
She interviewed me about my poetry and included 3 of my poems.
Click on the link and feel free to give her or me some feedback!

WRITE ON!!!

Eat me!

In case u want to ingest gold... U can find it and other precious metals in the cake bake aisle at Hobby Lobby.

Warning: Don't eat this when ur baked, however, it will never satisfy the munchies.

Another door opens

Yesterday and today in the 70s, birds singing, flowers sprouting, windows n slider open...The fresh spring air bringing with it new hopes.

Frankenhooker

Went to see Frankenhooker at Wealthy theater to support Gilda's Club during Laughfest. I thought it'd be packed like a Rocky Horror picture show with peeps all dressed up. Nope. One wolf, n Mr. Spookify who dresses vampirish but howls like a wolf.

N then there was meeee. I brought my little Frankenhooker doll, n she wore the fuck me pumps so I didn't have to. I did, however, have stitches drawn all over me, skull knee highs n gray chucks with glow in the dark laces.

Frankenstein is my all time fav book, so this spoof was calling to me. I went, I saw, I laughed, I crunched my face up. It was weird. But I liked her purple boobs!

London!

The first purchase was made from my asos marketplace collection!  I sent off baby blue gloves that were my mother's today to London!  It makes me happy.  Because I loved my mother's hands, and items that belonged to her are sentimental to me.  But, we can't keep everything.  I'm always happy to donate items to Mel Trotter, but certain things, well, I just felt like another life was intended for them.  So yeah, I'm quite pleased actually (I say with my bestest country Brit accent)...mum's baby blue gloves are off to play in London!

Just now, I saw photos my friend Eddie posted on FB--from where?  London!  #jealous of him and the gloves!  dang!  wish I could go there!  I was there once as wee girl with my parents en route & perhaps returning from France to visit my mum's fam.  I remember being on a bus with my little French dolls that I carried in a cute little bassinet style carrier.  I was covering them up with wee blankets to keep them from getting wet from the rain.  Those Brits sure loved me, I can remember how they smiled watching me...they adored and cooed about how I cared more about little babies getting wet and cold than I cared about myself.  It's a sweet memory.  Awww nostalgia!

The pretty blue gloves off to London!

One of Eddie's pix taken in London--I wanna adopt one of these cats!

Puppy Love

My Photography Style

Here's a few before/after images to show my approach to retouching/colorizing my photography.  I've developed a sort of style where I stray from complete black & white and colorize it a bit.  Or, with color, I gray it down a bit.  I think my art has begun to transcend my self.  I just came to this epiphany while throwing these few sample images together in an attempt to create a price list and give those inquiring an idea of how I work, and how I might make them look.  I've always known that I don't see anything entirely in black or white, or left or right.  I say this during debates, and I voice it in my poetry.  It is now evident that I show it in my photography.  I didn't realize this until now.  But yes, my photography is indeed an extension of self.  It's a visual map of how I see things--quite literally.

When photo retouching, I will:

• soften/lighten under eye circles
• whiten teeth
• remove pimples
• smooth complexion
• soften wrinkles
• remove cellulite
• remove any stray threads, hairs, or imperfections in the photo
• make you look the best you can without making you like a plastic surgery victim!

 

You can view a sample portfolio of my photography here:  PHOTOGRAPHY BY COLETTE

u just can't win

There's an old song by the J. Geils Band called Love Stinks
that has lyrics that ring so true with so many:

You love her
But she loves him
And he loves somebody else
You just can't win 

Yeah, Yeah...Love Stinks.


I was having a little barbershop conversation earlier, and I've learned a lot in my years of cutting hair and pouring drinks and livin' this life...u just can't win.  Why is that?  Why is it that it is so difficult to find reciprocated love?  There always seems to be such an imbalance.

He loves him, but he wants a girl...but he doesn't really know how to talk to girls.  And the girl who adores him just happens to be in a man's body.  "You can't help who you love" he says.

And then there's him...him who loves him, but that him is married to a her.  I'm sure he loves her, but.  That brings in the question...Why is it that someone can love someone enough to marry them, to spend days and nights with them, but feels passion for someone else?

I wonder...Are men incapable of combining lust and love?  Do they confuse lust with love?  I read something not long ago about the male brain, how if it feels compassion for say a woman, then its desire nodes don't light up...and if it feels desire, the compassion leaves the brain.  whoa.  how's that for core differences?  Of course the scientific journal worded it with greater precision, I'm just giving u the summary.

Then there's her, who is a him, who loves her, but she loves him who is a her.  Follow me?  This isn't as simple as gender differences.  Male/Female yadda yadda blah blah.  I'm talkin' 'bout love here.  It really doesn't matter how someone identifies themselves.  What matters to me is.......

WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT TO FIND RECIPROCATED LOVE?

I want the kind where you feel both passion AND compassion mutually!

Nature must have some sort of hand in this.  But shit damn!  I want the Romeo to my Juliet AND the Juliet to my Romeo in one package!  You Dig?

Damn.

Evening Gowns

Added a couple of cocktail party dresses to my asos collection both by Niki Livas:

Brown Velvet Evening Gown

Red Evening Gown

ReallY?

500 years later and you ask me "Why the sad face?"

Cemetery Angels

I have a passion for cemeteries.  I don't know if it's because I feel connected to some of the lost souls, or if I feel like a ghost, or if they assure me that I'm alive?  An Internet friend pinned this pic on Pinterest:

I love it!  I love how she is reclined...how the mood is melancholy...how she doesn't appear awfully mournful, but almost simply Resting In Peace.


I have 2 angels in GR that I love to photograph--one in particular is my fav, and I feel some sort of spiritual connection to her.  I have used her image in various artworks.

This might be one of the 1st shots I took of her with b&w film:

Here's a painting I did "Resurrection" with color film photography (the feet are from a statue of Jesus in a different cemetery):

Here's pic I took in October, 2011...she has become more tarnished.  :(  I wish I could clean her/revive her/keep her alive.

girl's just gotta have fun

I've been gradually adding photos to my asos marketplace site to recycle some fashionable outfits.  I'll create a Fashion album for my FB page soon.  If nothing sells, at least I've given it a shot.  The photos might serve a purpose toward my photography career or legacy--who knows?  Whatever the case, I do what I do, cuz a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta to do!  haha  But...sometimes...a girl just wants to have fun!  So these were just me having fun with a few of the shots.  Maybe I'll play with more of them too, and they'll take on their own life n character aside from ol' asos.

Photo shoot with Krissy Dreamflower

Did another fashion shoot today for my asos site, tho nothing I've posted so far has sold. I'm not sure if my goods get seen on there, or if shipping costs hinder the out of country folks from buying? I still have photos from my prior two shoots to post too, but just adding a few at a time hoping to get noticed in the Just In section. It reached 50 degrees F here today! It was windy, but her wind blown hair looks great in the pix!

It was fun to spend time with her, and we went to Gaia after for some fabu vegetarian eats. Wishing I woulda brought home a Gaia cookie right now!

Hot topic

No...not the store...but an actual, exciting, current events topic....gimme one to write about for my blog.

Should I have a weekly hot topic?
Give free advice-be like a life couch/spirit guide? Or, like Sex and the City and share relationship ponderings? Interviews with artists?

What? What? 1-2-3 Go!

iQ'Viva!

Watched the new show with Jennifer Lopez n Marc Anthony-love it! They are traveling around Latin America n bringing some amazing talent to the US to share with us. I'm excited to watch these people perform! I believe in the end it will become a show Vegas. I can picture it being like Cirque du Soleil does Latin America! Tap dancer here, Congo drummer there, Argentinian dancers...waiting to hear some deep voiced Mexican female singer-hope they find one! They hv some young girl but that's not the true essence I don't think.

I want to go to Vegas to see them all if it comes together how I envision! N I hv just the dress to wear for the occasion! It's my version of Carrie Bradshaw's naked dress, but where's my version of Mr. Big?

One Love

Orgasm

I bought one today. Yeah, that's what's become of my life- buying an orgasm - cuz not many know how to give one anymore. I bought an orgasm...

...in the form of a blush...

by NARS

Whats a girl to do?

A plate of chocolate chip cookies n Sex and the City Season One- that's where my life is at- again? Still?

"No one has breakfast at Tiffany's, and no one has affairs to remember"

Pinterest

I've finally joined Pinterest.  



My friend Kellie has been on Pinterest for a while, and invited me before, but I wasn't ready to undertake another social site to maintain at the time.  Now there is Google+ that I gotta figure out.  geesh 
What's ya'alls take on Google+ ?  I'm not sure how it is supposed to merge with blogger, but I don't want it to screw up my blog, I'm comfortable with my little space here, and don't really like the appearance of the Google+ bloggy page thingee.  i dunno, maybe in time.

Vintage rules!

I'm getting the system down now for my AristCG's ASOS Marketplace Collection.  Here's a couple pix of my model Chelsea who has always seemed like she walked out of the 60s to me.

A Girl Gotta Do What a Girl Gotta Do!

Oh haven't I said that a lot in my life time!

I can't spend a lot of time whining about the tragedies, hardships, injustices and other struggles in my life--though perhaps I should spend a little time describing some of the former, or how will people begin to comprehend or identify if I don't?  But, I can't.  I am so much like a Vietnam Vet.  It's painful to relive some of these things--near maddening.  So...onward I press!

I am currently without a job for a few months.  I have too much debt after my year with breast cancer and the snowball effect of car troubles that followed.  I have a prick of a brother who took control of all my father's assets, blah blah blah.  No family nor partner to support me.  So...onward I press!

I've always been industrious.  I'll say it again:

A GIRL GOTTA DO WHAT A GIRL GOTTA DO!

Shy of selling my body or drugs...I do what I can, when I can, with what energy I have to try to make a buck here and there.  I'm nickel and dime'n it through life.  I'm making little cactus/succulent gardens & terrariums--Lucky 7 Gardens--though the expense is higher than the return so far.  I'm trying to get my art out there--my photography book In the Bedroom is now available as an ebook!  And now...I'm trying to sell some clothes off my back (well, my closet) on a website based out of London.  It's proven to be extremely time consuming.  There was the time spent photographing my models, and then days of doing photo facials and other editing to the images.  Then, and entire day--yes, entire day--just to get one entire outfit posted on the site!  phew  I hope I can narrow down the time spent on this process as I go along.  I hope it pays off.

Here are a few images and a link to my collection at asos Marketplace:   ArtistCG's collection

A couple of the outfits I will have to reshoot :( because though I thought I read all there was to read about the requirements, I didn't see that you could only have one person per photo until I went to list the items.  Chasity & Que sure look adorable in the shots of them together, so they'll be happy to have them anyway--and I like them too!  :)